Laws of Combat !

• Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo and not want to waste a bullet on you.
• Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself. 
• Never forget that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.
• Five second fuses always burn three seconds. 
• The easy way is always mined. 
• Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy other people to shoot at. 
• If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in the combat zone. 
• Incoming fire has the right of way. 
• No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection. 
• No inspection ready unit has ever passed combat. 
• If the enemy is within range, so are you. 
• The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire. 
• Tracers work both ways. 
• Professional soldiers are predictable; the world is full of dangerous amateurs. 
• Military Intelligence is an oxymoron. 
• Mines are equal opportunity weapons. 
• When in doubt, empty your magazine. 
• The side with the simplest uniform wins. 
• Combat will occur on the ground between two adjoining maps. 
• The most dangerous thing in the world is a Second Lieutenant with a map and a compass. 
• The more a weapon costs, the farther you will have to send it away to be repaired. 
• The complexity of a weapon is inversely proportional to the IQ of the weapon's operator. 
• If enough data is collected, a board of inquiry can prove anything. 
• To steal information from a person is called plagiarism. To steal information from the enemy is called gathering intelligence. 
• The weapon that usually jams when you need it the most is the G-3. 
• The bursting radius of a hand grenade is always one foot greater than your jumping range. 
• There is no such place as a convenient foxhole. 
• Density of fire increases proportionally to the curiousness of the target. 
• Success occurs when no one is looking, failure occurs when the General is watching. 
• Things that must be together to work can never be shipped together. 
• The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small. 
• If you have a personality conflict with your superior: he has the personality, you have the conflict. 
• If you enter CO's office with an idea, most likely, you will leave his office with the CO's idea.